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Photo by Mariah Wilson

Four simple ways to smuggle your pet into class

By Jill Girgulis, September 12 2017 —

University classes and family pets usually don’t mix, a struggle many students know all too well. After spending all summer with our furry friends, leaving them behind for class can be heartbreaking. That’s why we’ve come up with these tips and tricks to ensure you never have to say goodbye to your beloved pet ever again.

Dress it in a denim jacket:

Disguise your pet as a human by dressing it in a fall trend that everyone can get on board with. Place it in the seat next to you and make regular conversation with it. Who’s to say that the tiny hamster sitting next to you in calculus isn’t actually your new best friend? When people question your pet’s unresponsiveness, say he’s just really hungover from the Den last night.

Cloak of invisibility:

In the 20 years since the first Harry Potter book was released, do you really think no one has figured out a way to recreate J.K. Rowling’s ingenious eavesdropping robe? This cloak that renders the wearer invisible would be perfect for a reasonably sized basset hound snoring in the seat beside you. Just hope no one sits on your sneaky pupper.

Carry it in a really large lunch bag:

If anyone asks about the bag, tell them you didn’t feel like waiting in the lineup for the MacHall microwaves. Instead, justify your decision by saying your Calico’s body heat keeps your taquitos warm.

Just walk right in with it:

Pretty much no one pays attention to their profs, so they’re probably not really looking at you either. Hold your head up high as you strut into your lecture with your pet tiger on a gold leash. Lorde’s got nothing on you.

 

This article is part of our humour section.

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