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The SU must respect their own governance

By Derek Baker, January 24 2017 — The University of Calgary Students’ Union is a democratic organization, as described in their bylaws. Motions, policies and resolutions are voted upon by council members during meetings. The legitimacy of a democratically run institution rests on the foundation of adhering to the outcome of such votes. However, this…

The sun will come out tomorrow and so will your future with these horoscopes

By Derek Baker, January 24 2017 —   Aquarius  (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) After hitting snooze on your phone’s alarm for the seventh time in a row, Siri will make a snide comment, saying that you will amount to nothing in your life. Pisces  (Feb. 19 – March 20)  You will watch your roommate unblinkingly brush…

Students’ Union looks down at peasants below at Pack the Jack

By Derek Baker, January 17 2017 — Of the 1,881 fans who Packed the Jack for this year’s annual basketball classic, a notable few were also in the crowd. Or rather, they sat above it. Executives and representatives from the University of Calgary Students’ Union showed their support for the Dinos this year by viewing the…

Will 2017 be as crappy as 2016 was? The stars know!

By Derek Baker, January 10 2017 —   Capricorn  (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Deciding to eat healthier this year, you will find a way to incorporate kale into every meal. Unfortunately, kale is the most garbage-tasting edible leaf and your taste buds will no longer work properly after a week and a half of your new…

A serious review of Lady Gaga’s “Christmas Tree”

By Derek Baker, November 29 2016 — In 2008, Lady Gaga released one of the most unappreciated holiday songs in existence, “Christmas Tree.” However, it has recently come to my attention that many individuals think this song is some weird perverted metaphor for sex, to which I reply, “get your head out of the gutter.”…

Get lit this Christmas season with these cocktails

By Derek Baker, November 29 2016 — It’s that time of year again. With the combination of final exams, group projects, mall parking lots, festive decorating and family dinners, cortisol levels can skyrocket. Luckily, there’s one thing that we can all turn to during this stressful time of year — alcohol. Here are three new…

These horoscopes predict your future is for the birds

By Derek Baker, November 22 2016 — Sagittarius  (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) Upon receiving word that there is a family of Canadian geese on the path you use to walk to school, your commute will become 30 minutes longer after a necessary detour around their nest. Everyone knows that they’ll mess you up. Capricorn …

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