Academic Probation

Prominent vagrant accepts donation from down-on-his-luck billionaire

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Eminent member of the hobo community Emmett "Chinstrap" McGillicutty announced today his gracious acceptance of $3.55 and a partially eaten ham sandwich from a relatively unknown donor.

"I've always believed in giving back to the community," McGillicutty said to the assembled reporters during his weekly public address. "I didn't know much about this young man but I thought I'd give him a shot."

The announcement comes three days after the transaction took place between McGillicutty and James Riley, a 36-year-old software developer with a net-worth of $1.4 billion.

"It's been a tough year," Riley recounted. "If he hadn't taken the change I really would have been crushed."

McGillicutty said he isn't sure what he'll put the money towards, speculating he may like a new handkerchief to tie on the end of his traveling stick, but he already has plans for the partially eaten sandwich.

"I'm going to invest a little bit of it and live off the interest I think," I might even put a little into Mr. Riley's company, who knows."

McGillicutty is a well known figure in town after leading the boxcar rebellion of 1935, an imaginary event he created.

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