Entertainment
I CAN’T GET NO! Lyle Victor Alberta imagines life as one of Mick Jaggar’s illegitimate children in Jumpin’ Jack, performing at the High Performance Rodeo.
One Yellow Rabbit

Jumpin’ jack flash’s bastard child

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Do you suffer from the knowledge that you are one of Mick Jagger's illegitimate children? Are you having trouble dealing with it? Don't worry, there's help available at One Yellow Rabbit's High Performance Rodeo.

Co-produced by Crescent Moon Productions and OYR, Jumpin' Jack is a solo production courtesy of Lyle Victor Albert. Albert plays Jack, a man who must face up to the fact that he is the bastard child of a rock star.

His previous efforts, Scraping the Surface and Objects in Mirror are Stranger than they Appear-both award-winning one-man shows-explored his life with cerebral palsy. Jumpin' Jack, however, is completely fiction.

"I've been putting on one-man shows for a number of years," says Albert. "My previous shows were based on my experiences of growing up with a 'disability.' I wanted to do something completely different that wasn't about me so I came up with this idea of being Mick Jagger's illegitimate child." Besides celebrity, Albert borrowed from other parts of Jagger's life.

"Mick Jagger is known to have fathered a number of illegitimate children," he says. "I'm also a big fan of the Rolling Stones so I thought this would be fun-I get to use the music I love."

The music choices for the show range from some of the Stones' greatest hits to more obscure tracks, and provide the background for the show's story.

"I really enjoyed writing it," explains Albert. "I just had this idea that I was Mick Jagger's kid and then where did I go from there?"

Jack, whose mother left him at a very young age, organizes a meeting of all of Jagger's children. Through this meeting, the audience discovers his past.

"He's the head bastard-or at least that's his attitude," Albert says. "If I can make a comparison, it's something like The Odyssey-Jack's series of adventures on his quest to find his mother."

Despite the serious undertones, this play isn't a drama.

"It's funny!" exclaims Albert. "It has serious bits, but it's a good mix of comedy and intensive moments. My sense of humour is pretty off the wall, slightly off-center. People can take away what they want from it, but I think that we're all going to have a really good time."

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In 1960-61 Jim Morrison had a 14 year old Girlfriend named Martha Clark a unusually beautiful young girl originally from Magee Mississippi. Martha met Jim Morrison and a fellow named Gerry McClain while Martha was on vacation Tallahassee, Florida with her quite large family. When Jim's father George was told of the relationship he was more concerned about the legal ramifications of the relationship and the effect on his military career than he was with the kids feelings. After Martha turned up pregnant, George banned Jim from seeing Martha and recommended that the child be aborted ( a practice still illegal in many states ) or given up for adoption. George and Clara told the Clark's that they would have nothing to do with them or Martha and that Martha was obviously promiscuous. The child must be from another. Wanting to run away from the ridicule that a young unmarried pregnant girl is subject to in those days Martha married a 20 year old military man that had been trying to get her attention for some time. The child would now have a name and a father. Jim began dating a girl named Mary Werbelow. Martha continued to maintain contact with Jim and met Jim in August of 63 in Tallahassee, Florida. staying at one of the homes of one of Jim's vagabond friends. Martha and this friend went to a party at FSU to meet Jim. Jim was with Mary, Martha was crushed. The friend then started flirting with Mary while Martha and Jim were talking, a fight broke out between Jim and the friend and he left, with Martha.
>When George heard about the incident and the possibility of a resurgence, he flipped out. Shortly after this, Jim would simply disappear from Florida during break with out even a proper goodbye for his friends or Martha. Thus began his career at UCLA. Some believe that the move was to run from the Martha situation. I doubt it. Jim began to have problems at FSU and he was interested in film making. UCLA was the place to be for that. Martha of course became a staunch Doors fan, telling Chris about his uncle Jim the rock star and polluting the house with Doors records and memorabilia. The relationship with the military man never lasted long. Martha married a New Orleans native named Cyril Tallon and Chris was raised in Old New Orleans. At the age of 15 Chris formed a small Kenner band called Mojo Risin, imitating Jim with wig and all. He has since been in many bands, ICE, 701, Southbound, Monkey Fist, Psynchronoize, Bacchanal, and some say Dust for Life, although he is not on any recordings. It is thought that he left the band before the formation of the Dust for Life line up was formed from the fragmented band Bacchanal. It is unknown if Chris even knows these details about his past outside of the claim that Jim was some sort of friend "uncle". The only time a rumor started suggesting the relationship was in 1992 when Chris started a new tribute band named Mojo Risen, but when the rumor started, becoming upset with the cheesiness of it all, he quit. I believe a fellow named Eddie Scruggs was his manager at the time. I have tried to find Eddie to see how Chris was doing and where he was. I have talked to some of my industry contacts and understand that he was indeed living in New Orleans during Katrina and went to Memphis to hang out with the Elvis folk up there. These things have never been pursued or published and really don't matter outside of human interest.

Is it true, most of the people that could verrify/deny this have passed away. With the unfortunate loss of the wonderful of Clara Morrison, Jim's mother, who has just passed on 12/29/06, the truth may never be revealed. It is believed by some that the band knows about Chris and has even helped him with his music career. No one of authority that was close to Jim or Chris will comment at all on the matter. It is my understanding now that Chris denies the claim.