The Gauntlet / satire Archives - The Gauntlet

Tagged satire

Student gets flu shot, develops immunity to influenza

By Frankie Hart, November 8 2019 — On Oct. 24, second-year student Sam Starnuto got a flu shot in the MacHall North Courtyard expecting a normal vaccination, but something unusual happened. “So, I was feeling kinda funky after the shot,” said Starnuto. “Obviously, my arm hurt, since they put a needle in it, but also, my…

Western separation group emerges on campus

By Frankie Hart, November 5 2019 — Post-election tensions are rising as some Albertans are feeling the rage and alienation that has been stoking from all the way back before 2015. Such frustrations have culminated in the emergence of various groups advocating for separation from Canada. One such group recently formed on the University of…

Campus teen finally quits Juuling, takes up smoking

By Anton Charpentier, August 29 2019 — In a series of late-night tweets last Thursday, my friend and foreign exchange student Eli Lugisntbad vowed to the world that he would quit Juuling and instead take up smoking cigarettes. You read that right folks, smoking cigarettes with a lower-case c. It’s a bold choice for my Gen…

Student taking spring and summer classes honestly has no FOMO

By Frankie Hart, April 25 2018 — The start of spring at the University of Calgary campus brings sighs of relief for most. Students are finally liberated from academic responsibilities after exams and are free to relax, go on vacation or work and at least get direct compensation for their labour. However, for some students, the break…

Intellectual magpie in TFDL just wanted to study in peace

By Derek Baker, April 24 2018 — Feathers were ruffled this exam season in the Taylor Family Digital Library, where students’ studying sessions were interrupted by an allegedly trapped magpie on the first two floors of the building. Efforts to catch and release the bird led to the school closing the library for a night…

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