Tagged winter

Premature Christmas celebrations cause kerfuffle

By Devin Aggarwal, November 23 2017 — The annual war on Christmas reached new levels of severity this week, as members of the Union against early Christmas Plans (UCP) retaliated against the Nativity Decorators Protectorate (NDP) for their continued promotion of the practice of putting up Christmas decorations before Dec. 1. The retaliation took the…

Three completely logical tips for driving on snowy roads

By Fatima Pirmohamed, November 23 2017 — It’s that time of year again. The temperature has dropped to the negatives and snow keeps falling. Though it’s a friendly reminder that winter break is just around the corner, it’s also responsible for the volume of car accidents increasing tenfold. If you’ve lived through a Calgary winter, you’ve…

How will you get by this finals season?

By Usman Zia, November 23 2017 — Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) You want to take a few exam prep courses, but can’t stand the thought of losing a couple hundred bucks from your study snacks budget. Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) You’ll join a study group in an effort to have some fun…

Five tips for beating the winter blues

By Christie Melhorn, November 9 2017 — Every year, the frenzy of Calgary’s first snowfall results in hundreds of car accidents and even more bitter Facebook statuses. Once the initial shock of snow fades, those of us with a deeply rooted preference for summer are plagued by general mopiness. Whether you’re a snowbird, would rather…

We forecast your future involves snow

By Danielle Leong, November 7 2017 —   Scorpio  (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) You will fall through a mysterious opening in the snow and enter a majestic underground tunnel that leads to the North Pole. Unfortunately, you’ll take a wrong turn and end up in your next lecture.   Sagittarius  (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) After…

Your future looks very, very cold

By Derek Baker, October 31 2017 —   Scorpio  (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) A Christmas song will play on the radio this week. You will deliberately crash your car to make it stop.   Sagittarius  (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) It will be so cold out that your hand will stick to the metal…

BREAKING NEWS: It’s so friggen cold outside

By Derek Baker, October 2 2017 — Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Why do we live in this hellscape??!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!! The air hurts my face. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa This article is part of our humour section.

Tips for surviving a Calgary winter

By Derek Baker, November 20, 2014 — After three and a half days of autumn, the chilly fingers of winter have tightened their grip around the city. If this is your first winter in Calgary, or if you need a quick refresher on dealing with the cold, follow these pointers. If they don’t work out,…

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